The Grief Directory

I thought that having lost my father as a child I understood loss – but a mother is a very particular thing, which one knows in the living and brutally relearns in the loss. (Margot)

Losing one’s mother is life changing. It doesn’t matter how old or young your mother (or you are), it’s your mother. The rest of your life will be shaped by it. But it will be ok. (Helen Y)

Yes, grief is a tricky one and takes its own time to work through. Keep talking about the feelings, however difficult it might seem. It does help. Mind how you go. (Paul H)

We only have one mother. The roots and tendrils of that relationship beginning long before memory. Death is always tough. All the best for the road ahead. Good luck. (Sam)

Grief takes its own goddamned time. And it’s kinda empty words to point that out, but it will subside. All about (and isn’t it a silly term) self-care at this stage. I find swimming helps. (Ben)

Grief is entirely specific to the person – let it be about you. (Pat)

You’re vulnerable and in shock. Anger is based on safety. Go with it. (Kay)

Loss is hard, it takes tolls in all kinds of ways, both expected and unexpected. (Laura C)

‘The Grief Directory’ is taken from Richard’s forthcoming collection, ‘Invisible Sun’, which will be published by Smokestack in February 2021.

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